with or without a reason...

I don't know if I should be happy or sad....I mean for any random joe blow..harry or dick....I would appear to be a normal happy soul...but I'm not....I think I know what the reasons are at times...but at others I'm at a loss for reasoning...to rationalise my own reactions and behaviour....

I'm not all that unpredictable...but theres this anger burning up a hole in me...anger for what I do not know....but I know I have this excess energy that needs to be channelised before it leads to something extreme....lifes been a boring monotonous something for as long as I can remember and I don't see it changing anytime soon....which pisses me off majorly....

I like things/people I would myself not categorise as nice/amiable....when I ask myself why...I can't find a reason for it.....well I can to an extent but still doesn't justify why I would stick to such and such....my studies are nearing an end....

Wanna switch my stream.....most people see it as immature and eccentric....but to me I have my own reasons....It'll make me happy...actually more than that....I am looking for a niche to ...get away from the mental turmoil that is churning up inside everyday.....

for now that has to be put on halt.....coz of lack of the right things.....but I hope I can get back to it a year or two from now....even to myself it sounds too far fetched at times......but I hope the instinct stays alive and I can pursue it....if not It'll be a regret i shall nurture forever...what if I had given it a try.....

theres too many what if's circling around teh periphery of me cephalon at all times....if only i could get some answer...if only.....

on a different note....I have been working my ass offf for the past few weeks....my supervisor is a boob-staring-good-for-nothing-ass who has not done much to help me with my research....he is not even hot..!!

I have been downloading a lot of disney animations and all of house MD episodes for a while now....I already have all of season 4...shall soon have the rest...a great addition to my repertoire...:)

I absolutely love house...I know you must be thinking (if u at all watch it) whts so great abt him....everything....he's whole persona is so attractive...hot old men..I have hots for lot of them....:).....Ihave changed my sleep cycle totally...I go to sleep arnd 3:30 am on all days but tuesdays....and I also am sick of teaching idiotic-dumb-arses-who-have-brains-the-size-of-peanuts....feel like stabbing myself at times....gets to me at times...:(

I still havn't been able to watch persepolis... :'( someone please come with me...anyone...please please....

watch this...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_QMFJUX3JY&feature=related:) I plaigiarised the title of the post...its one of my favourite posts by a fellow blogger...oh but i guess its not plaigiarising...if i'm acknowledging it...:P